Something I’ve learned about myself

A recent inside AVP Workshop  had a powerful impact on a number of participants.

These comments were shared attesting to the impact for positive change that AVP can have in someone’s life. The workshop topics were Respect, Communication, and Forgiveness.

“I have the power to be positive.”

“I have learned that I do love myself no matter what. To me, AVP is special.”

“I need to be better at forgiving myself and let go of my past and live
happily. AVP is one of the best programs to take and to use in your everyday
life. Thank You!”

“I plan to always forgive myself and others no matter what and don’t hold
grudges against yourself or anyone else. AVP is a great learning experience we
all can use for life and teach others also.”

Something I’ve learned about conflict resolution, violence and its alternatives….

“Something I have learned is when you see a problem, work to fix it and save
friendships.”

“There is good in all of us. It just needs to be brought out.”

“I am using tools I learned in all my AVP workshops.”

“I have learned to take your time and seek the most positive outcome for all
parties.”

“I learned how to diffuse situations before they escalate in a negative way.
Communication and forgiveness is the key.”

“I learned you don’t always have to resolve conflict with violence. All you have
to do is use the Transforming Power. Each of us has the power to change a
conflict situation.”

” I loved the class!!  To me, AVP is powerful. I would recommend AVP to a very
close friend. I’m going to continue to come to AVP.”

Do You Know? Domestic Violence

Domestic Abuse

Approximately 1.3 million women and 835,000 men are physically assaulted by an intimate partner annually in the United States (1).

Unfortunately, many people are unaware of the danger they face or even that they may be in an abusive situation.  According to Nebraska Statutes § 28-323:

• A person commits the offense of domestic assault in the third degree if he or she:
  • Intentionally and knowingly causes bodily injury to his or her intimate partner;
  • Threatens an intimate partner with imminent bodily injury; or
  • Threatens an intimate partner in a menacing manner
• A person commits the offense of domestic assault in the second degree if he or she intentionally and knowingly causes bodily injury to his or her intimate partner with a dangerous instrument.
• A person commits the offense of domestic assault in the first degree if he or she intentionally and knowingly causes serious bodily injury to his or her intimate partner. . . . . . . . .
  
• For purposes of this section, intimate partner means a spouse; a former spouse; persons who have a child in common whether or not they have been married or lived together at any time; and persons who are or were involved in a dating relationship. For purposes of this subsection, dating relationship means frequent, intimate associations primarily characterized by the expectation of affectional or sexual involvement, but does not include a casual relationship or an ordinary association between persons in a business or social context.

Indicators of an Abusive Relationship

These are red flags that can serve as indicators of an abusive relationship.

• An abuser might…
• Abuse alcohol or other drugs
• Have a history of trouble with the law and / or fights
• Refuse to work or go to school
• Abuse siblings or pets
• Put down people and / or call names excessively
• Always be angry with someone or something
• Move too fast, too soon in a relationship
• Try to isolate you from your friends and family
• Nag or force sexual encounters
• Cheat on you
• Be physically rough (restraining, pushing, and pulling)
• Take your money (or other ways of taking advantage)
• Accuse you of being flirtatious
• Refuse to listen to your opinions
• Ignore you or give you silent treatment
• Blame all arguments and problems on you
• Have extreme mood swings
• Tell you to shut up, call you fat, stupid or dumb

If you are being abused you might…

• Feel afraid to break up
• Feel tied down
• Feel afraid to make decisions
• Tell yourself that if you just try harder it will be OK
• Find yourself crying a lot, being depressed or unhappy
• Find yourself worrying or obsessing about how to please your partner
• Find the physical or emotional abuse slowly getting worse

Visit the ATV (Colorado) “Recognize Abuse” (http://www.alternativestoviolence.org/Pages/RecognizeAbuse.php) site for more information on recognizing the signs of abuse.

(1) Patricia Tjaden & Nancy Thoennes, U.S. Dep’t of Just., NCJ 183781, Full Report of the Prevalence, Incidence, and Consequences of Intimate Partner Violence Against Women: Findings from the National Violence Against Women Survey, at iv (2000), available at http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/nij/pubs-sum/183781.htm

 

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This personal testimony by Jimmie Martinez is eloquent and powerful.

Roger Kluck of Seattle, and former AVP/USA President, was doing a workshop at the Tacoma Recovery Cafe when Jimmie,  who was next door , heard that an AVP workshop was underway. Jimmie had to come in share his experience discovering AVP  in a New Jersey SuperMax in 1995. Roger visited with Jimmie and filmed his testimony.

 

 

The high cost of taking away prisoners’ Medicaid coverage

Writing at CNNMoney  on April 18, 2018, Lydia DePrillis writes the critical safety net of disability benefits and Medicaid coverage that millions of people lose every year when they are released from prison.

For Lori Stone, getting out of prison has always been a little nerve-racking.

She’s been in and out of jail since she was 18. Every time she’s been released, she’s lost her disability benefits and her Medicaid coverage. That meant she couldn’t afford her rent or her medication for her bipolar disorder until she was able to re-enroll, which could take weeks or months — even if she went to all her appointments on time.

“That would put me into a bad spell of being depressed, and my moods would be bad,” says Stone, 37, over the phone from the Douglas County Jail in Omaha, Nebraska. “And then I would end up doing something stupid like shoplifting to get alcohol. It’s just a vicious cycle.”

That critical gap in safety net programs, which has set Stone up for failure again and again, is a harsh reality for millions of people released from prison every year — and one that counties are now trying to get fixed. . . .

To read the full article, The high cost of taking away prisoners’ Medicaid coverage

Twelve Angry Jurors

“12 Angry Jurors” is the latest production from Southeast Community College’s theater program with the curtain opening Friday, Sept. 8 and Saturday Sept. 9 at 7:30 p.m. in the auditorium at the Jack. J. Huck Continuing Education Center.

The production is a courtroom drama based on the play “12 Angry Men,” which later became a well-known film in 1957 starring Henry Fonda. Changing the name to “Jurors” allows women and men to fit the roles.

The plot is 12 jurors, all very different, must decide the fate of a 19-year-old man on trial for allegedly stabbing his father to death. The play examines the roles of juries in our society and how a group of strangers must come together to decide the fate of a stranger. The play and its themes transcends all political lines and deals with human nature.

The cast is a combination of 13 community members and SCC students and staff.

“This is contemporary, edgy and affects all of us, especially when it deals with pre-conceived ideas of people,” said Jon Gruett, SCC theater instructor. Gruett also said there will be a panel of legal professionals who will take part in a post-play question-and-answer session with the audience.

The play is part of a class at SCC called “Yes You Can be a Star!” where students not only get to be part of a production, but also be part of the stage crew.

Cost to attend the show is $10 for general admission and $5 for students. Cash and checks only. Both performances are at 7:30 p.m.

 

 

Something I’ve learned about conflict resolution, violence and its alternatives….

At a  recent inside  workshop , these comments were shared attesting to the impact for positive change that AVP can have in someone’s life.

• “It’s good to know that you have power to find a different way of dealing with problems in a non-violent way.”
• “You can find yourself in all kinds of situations but you can always find a better outcome if you think first.”
• “The possibility for violence is always lurking under the surface of every situation….I now have other options at my disposal to help come to positive and constructive outcomes…there’s always an alternative.”
• “To slow down, re-evaluate the situation, and think about what the outcome is going to be.”

Role Plays. . .

• “The role playing was the hardest to do, but the most enjoyable.”

Something I’ve learned about myself…..

• “It won’t kill me to express my feelings to any other human.”

 

O.J. Simpson and the Impact of AVP

 

O.J. Simpson Credits Alternatives to Violence Project training to helping him deal with conflict while in Lovelock Correctional Facility

On Thursday, July 20, 2017, after 9 years of incarceration for armed robbery, O.J. Simpson sat in on his Parole hearing. During the hearing he stated the programs and steps he took to rehabilitate saying:

“I took two courses (Basic & Advanced) that I guess you guys don’t give much credit to.  It’s called Alternatives to Violence. It’s the most important course anyone in this prison could take as it teaches you to solve conflict through conversation.”

OJ Simpson is one of thousands of persons who have been incarcerated that have benefited from these trainings.

To see comments from participants in AVP/NE  workshops about the impact of AVP in their lives, see the post category, What I Learned from AVP

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It is easier build strong children than repair broken men.

Is What You’re Doing An AVP Workshop? The Core Elements of AVP Workshops

After the 2011 AVP International Gathering, the AVP International and AVP USA Education Committees formed a Joint Best Practices Team to continue to explore how AVP is practiced and adapted to cultures and settings around the world, and to sponsor a worldwide discussion on the principles, values and best practices of AVP, AVP workshops and facilitation.

Is What You’re Doing An AVP Workshop? The Core Elements of AVP Workshops is published for the use of AVP facilitators around the world and for others who use elements of AVP or the AVP style in other workshops, formats, or settings.

Other readers are advised that the material in this booklet is based on a particular philosophy and a set of carefully structured group dynamics, without which the material discussed here has no context.

Click on the graphic below to open the document,”Is What You’re Doing An AVP Workshop? The Core Elements of AVP Workshops.”

 

Punished Twice: Prisons Basically Ignore ADA, Leaving a Third of Inmates Facing Abuse and Neglect

The article below appeared on December 28, 2016 at “Vice News”  the current affairs channel for  Vice Media, Inc.

Prisons across the U.S. routinely flout the Americans with Disabilities Act, subjecting thousands of inmates with physical and mental health problems to painful and sometimes humiliating conditions, according to watchdog groups, inmates, corrections officials, and a former Justice Department official.  To read the full article:  Punished Twice

VICE News is an international news channel created by and for a connected generation. Our documentaries and original news series bring you an unvarnished look at some of the most important events of our time, and shine a light on underreported stories around the globe.